Elizaveta Ephemeris

Musical tinkering

Sometimes the best things come through when you are just messing around.

Here is something in progress. As it gets finished, I think it will sound quite different, but for now, here is Endless:

 

 

new song lyrics

So what a couple of weeks! Video shoots, raging strep throat and more. All meriting another entry in a moment... Why didn't I blog while in bed? Good question. Maybe because I was so miserable all I could do was watch BBC crime series. And so this means I owe my blog lots of attention...again.

For now, happy to say this song below will make it on the 2 EPs out in the coming few months. It feels right.

 

Love Song #3.

 

You are so bad for me

But I love you tenderly

I couldn’t bear the thought

That you may go

 

But you are a faceless wall

Sometimes you’re a carnival

And if you swallow me whole

I need to know

 

Is it addiction that feeds me

Is it affection that binds me

It takes so little to cure me

Why did you have to remind me

 

That you are so good to me

When I hate you bitterly

You rise above, fill me with love

Until I choke

 

You are the Christmas day

You laugh my rage away

You’re always right

So why do I fight

And try to provoke

 

Is it addiction that feeds me

Is it affection that binds me

It took so long to convince me

That you were destined to find me

 

(instrumental/vocal bridge)

 

You see the best in me

You love my honesty

You never stop

And you pick me up

When I am low

 

But this is a travesty

Cause you don’t mean a damn to me

I want to care

But it’s just not there

And you gotta know

 

It’s the addiction that feeds me

You are the habit that binds me

You’ve given all just to please me

Now you should learn to despise me

Now you should learn to despise me...

bloggs:)

I think blogging more regularly is finally starting to become a habit. I often come across blogs of artists and personalities I am interested in - only to find out that their blog entries are often one a month or even less. I wonder why that is? Why start a blog if you are disinclined to write?

I can posit a reason or two: sometimes, life just takes over. It is so fast, furious, or even simply nice, that writing about it seems to be a moot point. Why write when life is so full you don't feel the need to fictionalize it in any way? Or when everything is a nice routine? Writing when you are content seems to be less of an urgent activity than when you are striving, unhappy, nostalgic and desire to express yourself. If an artist's life is normal, happy and full of normal, happy regular things - what is there to write about? Maybe there is, but there is less of an urge to try and do so.

Sometimes, however, it's the opposite. An artist won't write because he/she feels too fragile to write, because everything has gone wrong. Some of us are less inclined to share our faults and failures with the world at large. "No news is good news" sort of thing. What this means is: we hide when we are weak and feel lost. Reaching out to the world and letting it know we are in trouble seems like a cop-out and a signal that we are, indeed, failing and unworthy. An artist who has been public for a while is also surrounded by people - management, label and others. If there is a sense of frustration and it has been vented online, it will surely find its way to be seen by those who are connected to the artist's career, which is probably not a good thing.

And finally, it may be a question of discipline. Starting something is easy - like buying a plant. Sticking with it, feeding it, making sure it gets water regularly, trimming it, puting it in a bigger pot - well, that's a whole other thing. Good thing: blogs are like succulents - they don't die. Blog or not blog, your page is still there. 

I used to be terrible with plants, in fact - before my whole 'flower alchemist' phase. I am quite a bit better now. When I look at my plants now I can almost tell when they are happy or not: it is almost as if it is talking to me. That doesn't give me any ideas as to WHY that is, of course, but most of the time it is pretty easy: it wants attention. With attention comes water and care. A little bit of regular attention to anything, and it will grow and flower, including a blog: regular being the key word here.

This morning I found a great quote from Tchaikovsky: 

“There is no doubt that even the greatest musical geniuses have sometimes worked without inspiration. This guest (inspiration) does not always respond to the first invitation. We must always work, and a self-respecting artist must not fold his hands on the pretext that he is not in the mood. If we wait for the mood, without endeavouring to meet it half-way, we easily become indolent and apathetic. We must be patient, and believe that inspiration will come to those who can master their disinclination.” 
― Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky

It is so true, in my opinion. In Russian we say: "Аппетит приходит во время еды". This means: Appetite arrives while you are having the meal. 

I do use Twitter, of course, but there is something so annoying about having to use 140 characters. I prefer it for news and communication, as well as keeping up with people I admire, who are online - like Esa-Pekka Salonen, who is my favorite conductor, and many others.

And so I am happy to say that I am getting back into blogging regularly - not to blog but to write, because I am developing a taste for it again. Writing should be done for writing's sake, otherwise it is contrived, stunted and reads more like a press release, than an account of human experience. Same goes for poetry: I have been so focused on music recently, I only now realized how much I have neglected my poetry. Not that both don't go hand in hand, because I do write lyrics, and that can be constituted as a form of poetry. However, what makes writing poetry different is that there is no music involved, and words and the spaces in-between are both the brush, palette and the canvas.

 

 

Hero's Journey

As I jokingly said to a friend the other day: 

"Maybe I should stop with the archetypal - and one word - song titles!"

Consider: in my Beatrix Runs album I had:

Meant

Dreamer

Nightflyers

Orion

Victory

 

And now, some of my new songs:

Hero

Spaceman

Messenger

Sorry

.....Do we detect a pattern here? What could this mean??

On another note, tonight I am performing Hero for the first time live. Butterflies.

I am also playing with the musicians who were with me at the iTunes Live Capitol Sessions last summer. They are so amazing. Here they are - well, minus string quartet this time, but the drummer and the bassist are the same - Jimmy Paxson and Michael Valerio. I love them.

Elizaveta - Armies of Your Heart - iTunes Live from Elizaveta on Vimeo.

 

 

The crowd sourcing idea I had for Hero really appealed to many people, apparently! I have over 100 emails from fans who want to be in the Virtual Choir. That is very, very cool. This is going to be an amazing choir, and can you imagine all those different energies pouring into it? I am excited. If you signed up, wait another few days to get all the information about and hows and the whens.

Also, in about 10 days I will get a chance to record a children's choir for the same thing. And we will film it, too. Wow! More on that later.

 

If you are reading this today - April 10, Wednesday, and you are not in L.A., we'll stream some of the show - badly, but one has to start somewhere:) and this link HERE, via USteam, starting 8 PM PST.

Rolling Stone - New Song, Video & Lyrics

So here it is:

 

Full interview version for when it premiered on Glamour.com can be read HERE.

 

Looked me in the eye

Made me feel so small

But you're the only one

who can see me at all

Is it who we are?

what am I to you?

Have we gone too far -

am I passing through?

 

I'm a rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling stone

Always moving, traveling, running all alone

I'm a rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling stone

 

Maybe I was born with a gypsy's soul

but I am not your girl, oh no

I don't play that role

I'm no mother, I'm no sister, I'm no lover

I am not your friend

I have built a home

but it's made of sand

 

I'm a rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling stone

Always moving, traveling, running all alone

I'm a rolling, rolling, rolling, rolling stone

 

Looked me in the eye

Made me feel so small

But you're the only one

who can see me at all...

new song lyrics

Perhaps another time

 

Pictures in a magazine of places you have never seen

you cut them out and put them on the wall

in a faded photograph a perfect moment makes you laugh

but memories can make you feel so small

 

There'll be sunlight on the snow in places we will never go

on mountains we will never ever climb

there will be a price to pay

for every single wasted day you chose to say: perhaps another time

 

hostage of my own world I dream of oysters and their pearls

I always pick the wrong one in the end

with all the roads for us to take

I always find the one that's fake

and build my perfect castles on the sand

 

And we will never catch that train

somewhere in Scotland in the rain

grab the sun and flip it like a dime

there will be a price to pay

for every single wasted day when we said: perhaps another time

 

so all those days will run together

perfect shade of black & white

me, I thought I'd live forever

and fill my life with light

 

there'll be sunlight on the snow

in places I will never go

on mountains I will never ever climb

there will be a price to pay

for every single wasted day I said to you: perhaps another time

 

Cluttered floors inside my room

I wake up and it's half past noon

inside this dungeon, telephone is king

maybe I should catch a plane before they tell me I'm insane

join a circus, maybe learn to sing

 

And maybe we will catch that train

somewhere in Scotland, in the rain

grab the sun and flip it like a dime

never knowing what we'll find

we'll ride the wind and glance behind

but never say: perhaps another time.

 

Perhaps another time

Perhaps another time

perhaps another time.

(EIK, July 2012)

Attends! Attends..

Here is the complete demo of the French cover I have done recently, Ma Préférence by Julien Clerc. I wouldn't say that his style of music is very close to mine, but this is a brilliant song and I intend to make it part of my performing repertoire - I love the harmonic changes and the message. I am also translating it into English and Russian.

I added an intro from a classic French film (can you guess which one?) Hint: Gerard Depardieu is in it. Although, fair to say he is in almost EVERY French film of the recent 40 years. That man gets around.  

 

 

Here is the translation, as promised. This is a very literal one because I didn't try to write something here that would be more poetic.. yet.. as in real lyrics, so it doesn't flow well at all, but it is good enough to get an idea. The actual translated lyrics, as I hear them in my head, would carry the message across, but would not be the same words...

I love this song and its basic concept that sometimes, contrary to popular thought, others do not necessarily see better or are able to judge more accurately when it comes to our own lives and who we want in them. Sometimes it's best to withhold judgment, because there may be something there we do not see or would not value for ourselves, and yet it is everything to another person.

The original of the song is about her. When I did the cover, I switched it to him, and I think it makes it almost even more poignant.

 

 

I know that you don't approve of him

and his way of showing that he belongs to me

you fall silent around us

and yet, I choose him

 

Yes, I know - this air of indifference that's his defence

It often offends you

But when we are surrounded by my friends made of porcelain

I know where his failure lies.

Yes I know - you don't believe that I can be faithful to him

and you are already speaking of him in past tense

But he really is what I want.

 

You should believe me when I say

that I am the only one who can tell when he is cold

he only has eyes for me

and incidentally, he loves my uncertainty

while I love his solitude.

 

I know that you don't approve of him

and his way of showing that he belongs to me

you fall silent around us

and yet - he is my lucky charm

I choose him.

He is what I want.

 

 

 

Spring Song - new song lyrics

Out in the street

the winter's shedding her disguise

and people smile

and look into each other's eyes

You walk with me

the air's fragrant like a ball

I can't say why

but I am feeling ten feet tall

 

And everyone can hear my melody unfold

the time has come to open up and let go of the old

because it's Spring

there must be something better on the way

awakening, I raise my voice to this Life.

 

You're by my side

Your every word is fresh and new

it must be spring that made me fall in love with you

the green makes way through overwhelming gray concrete

and I can see the flowers blooming down the street

 

And everyone can hear my melody unfold

the time has come to open up and let go of the old

because it's Spring

there must be something magic on the way

awakening, I realize that

 

I want you to stay

I want you to stay

I want you to stay

 

You say to me: 'I know exactly what you mean;

If you say "Go!" - I'll throw my caution to the winds

You may be right and we're a temporary thing

but here's our chance to taste a little bit of spring'..

 

So everyone can hear our melody unfold

the time has come to open up and let go of the old

because it's Spring

there must be something better on the way

and when we sing, we raise our voices to Life.

(EIK@ 2012)

 

 

You (new song lyrics)

I will be premiering this tonight.

On this:

 

YOU

I would have given you a world without an end

If you had only crossed that bridge you'd built towards me

I drew a treasure map; you held it in your hand

Because the time before you tried - you nearly lost me

 

It's you, you - the distance I must brave

You, you - the mystery uncharted

You, you - the burning in my veins

You, you - the only thing that matters

 

Of all the continents discovered on my quest

you were the fairest one - a tantalizing vision

So when I landed on your shores, I loved you best

To make a home with you became my worst decision

 

It's you, you - the history I've made

You, you - that bears not repeating

You, you - the silence in my veins

You, you - that keeps my heart from beating

 

Wind is turning on me

waves are churning on the sea

ships are burning...

 

You.

(2012@EIK)

Laid So Low (Tears Roll Down)

So this is my cover of a Tears for Fears song. I do love them - I am going to cover more of their songs, but this is a start. I love this song's starkness and the intensity of the lyrics. 

 

 

 

"Laid So Low (Tears Roll Down)"

Chewed the bone down too low
Got fed on tea and sympathy
Blew the sail like the wind
I wish you were my enemy
I was humble for you
What a fool I've been to have
Laid so low for so long
Into that void of silence
Where we cry without sound
Where tears roll down
Where tears roll down
And where your mother's violence
Sent your soul underground
Where tears roll down
Where tears roll down
Drew the blade way too slow
Was shackled by your honesty
Made a mess, I guess I have should have known
That life was lust and liberty
Not a chance mutation or the last temptation
Laid so low for so long, so low
Into that void of silence
Where we cry without sound
Where tears roll down
Where tears roll down
And where your mother's violence
Sent your soul underground
Where tears roll down
Where tears roll down

(Tears for Fears)

 And here is the original: