Yes, it was my birthday.
I went horseback riding! It reminded me how much I miss it. There is something very rejuvenating to me in the act of collaboration with a giant creature. Yes, collaboration, because make no mistake, if the horse REALLY doesn't want you there, it will win, unless you are a top of the line rider. It's about collaboration and acting 'as if' you were a great rider (without being cruel or stupid, of course).
It's about the Power of Persuasion:)
I am feeling a bit more rested. But I am behind on so much work.
And I have four new songs in the pipeline. Ack. They are not being patient. They don't care it's a holiday and I'd rather watch 'Sherlock' (fantastic BBC series. I am a sucker for BBC productions). They want to be written NOW.
Speaking of now... The horoscope for my day of birth tells me to... Lighten up a little – it’ll do wonders for your soul! Once you have learned the Capricorn lesson of achieving all your goals without turning into a wet blanket you will easily be one of the happiest and successful inhabitants of the zodiac.
Alright, I'll buy that:)
I was working on the cover of Marshmallow World, and it was sounding amazing - until this morning I uncovered some icky distortion on the piano track. Perhaps it's a sign and it really needs to have guitar on it - in which case, Ben Cassorla, my guitar player is going to have to step in this afternoon. As soon as we are done, I will post it for you! But now back to the grind..
But not before I present you with a little pre-New Year's gift. Obviously too late for Christmas, but there is still a chance for me to redeem myself.
This is the original acoustic one-take demo of Snow in Venice. This is where it all (or a lot of it) started. Enjoy and download to share. You can download it by clicking on the arrow icon on the right side of the player below.
So it's a little crazy, but I have had new songs and ideas coming out of my ears, literally.
Last night I sat down to work on the Christmas cover, and instead ended up writing a brand new New Year song.
Well, I am going to finish the Christmas cover #1 today, however, and post it tomorrow, and go from there.
I have mostly snapped out of my year-end blues, and in no small part thanks to working on music as much as I can.
The artwork for the album looks amazing - Missy has done a brilliant job.
We should be done with it today. And tonight we celebrate, via Sherlock Holmes and dinner.
I am getting over a cold. Friday night I came back from NYC, where I was doing some press and promos for the upcoming record. I was so tired, and flying when you are getting sick is definitely one of the most unpleasant experiences ever, because as you get achey, there is no way to stretch out or rest properly.
When I woke up Saturday morning, my throat was in agony.
But fortunately my trusty herbs were waiting for me, and after two days of rest and herbal regime 'a la Elizaveta', I am getting over this.
Yes... hello, year end 2011. 2012 is almost here. And so is my birthday.
Is it strange that every year now I dread this time more and more? I tell myself it is time to relax and look back at all I have accomplished, but all I manage to do is look at all I have not. And beat myself up for it.
Maybe what can explain this phenomenon is an entry in my diary from when I turned 16. It says exactly:
'Oh my God. I have just turned 16 and I still have not accomplished anything'.
It goes to show then, that every year after that, the burden of 'non-accomplishment' probably grows until one day I'll end up buried underneath it. Or will I finally learn balance?
My recipe for my own winter's year end melancholy then is this:
1) a strict internet diet. (What I mean by this is staying away from the computer when I am not working on music/recording).
2) Music every day. Singing, playing, recording, guitar. Playing with other people.
3) back to swimming every day. I have joined the local YMCA and they have a wonderful pool.
4) meditation and some time spent each day working on feeling hopeful - and thankful.
5) some time spent playing in the snow around my birthday.
Perhaps I am burned out. At the moment 2012 seems like an insurmountable task, because it is really a litmus test of all that I am. It's a test. Is my music any good? Ah, and if it is good, is it good enough? Am *I* good enough? Or do I, at the end of it, decide to do something else, after all?
I guess the goal for me, in the coming month, is to figure out how to shed my past, and the baggage/tiredness that goes with it. Faith goes a long way, and without enthusiasm I certainly won't get anywhere.
But it's a question of balance, isn't it? You have to respect the sadness when it arises, because if you keep pushing yourself beyond it, it will accumulate in your chest and get you in the end. 2011 was wonderful in so many ways, and yet I am also hopeful that 2012 will be a little more... forgiving. But somehow I doubt that.
Anyway. I am working on a couple of Christmas covers, one of them is Italian. To be posted shortly.
I think I should write myself a birthday song.
Today I get to see the illustration and cover work for the record.
And then another two weeks and I will be re-born. December 26th, to be precise.