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I got a little burned out and spent the last day and a half basically being a vegetable and watching a lot of Japanese animation. Yeah, I am a geek, what can I say. When I have time, I'll take good anime over pretty much any TV or film stuff. It's probably no surprise then, that my new version of Dreamer I just recorded in Japanese (live video to follow shortly) sounds like something from the opening credits of an anime.
I need to get back to work tomorrow and give it one big final push until Christmas and my birthday roll around in a week and a half's time.
The energy feels odd these days. There is a lot of tension in the air. It feels like systems and structures are either breaking down or are at their limits. There have been two big shoot-outs and hostage situations in the last 48 hours. Maybe I am also afraid whether I can live up to what 2015 has in store for me.
I am also worried about Russia and its economy. I feel terrible about Ukraine and where it's headed in 2015. I don't understand the glee I often encounter online, Twitter and Facebook when it comes to economical woes of countries. I don't find it funny when pundits compete with each other for the pithiest tweet on the subject. Don't people understand that at some level, *all* the rich and powerful of the world are always ok? It's the normal, regular people who suffer when a currency goes way down or when sanctions are applied. It's the old people who have to survive on their measly pensions - children who don't get proper healthcare or education - nurses and musicians who don't get paid - and so on.
I also don't understand blanket hate and derision. I don't understand when someone posts under my audio for 'Hero' a comment: "F**ck all Russians".
Anyway. I think it's time I took a long break from all news and internet-related things.
And here are a couple of videos we shot recently, when I was in the studio, recording.
This is 'Marshmallow World' - one of my fav Christmas songs:
We kind of went overboard with Santa hats, but hey - sometimes you just need to be silly.
And this is 'Silent Night', in Russian:
I am going to take a couple of days off internet and work on music. Enjoy and see you soon...x
I am writing this, while I am laying in bed. Southern California has been finally blessed by the weather gods and we got another storm, courtesy of Hawaii. The Pineapple Express is drenching the city and the L.A. river, for once, looks like a river. I am happy for the plants and the hills.
This was a long and pretty intense week, as I was also fighting off a cold. We shot and recorded a bunch more live videos, some of which will go up shortly. Christmas songs, yea. And others.
I recorded some songs on Dragon Age Inquisition (video game) and recently it's been fun getting all the positive feedback from the fans.
We also laid down some foundation for the official "Hero" video this weekend. Without revealing too much yet, this is going to be epic and so much fun. Hint: swords, storyboards, epic adventure and cloaks to be involved.
Here is one of the songs I sang for Dragon Age, by the way. It's quite fun and mischivious:
In any case, as I am writing this, the sun is coming out. I am feeling contented, although tired. There's a lot of work ahead before my birthday and the year's end. But I am feeling hopeful and accomplished. Hard work, passion and faith will get me there.
So, as a little heads up, I will be launching a brand new music side project soon. It's called Spy Satellites and it will be All Electro All The Time. What that means is that this will be my electronic music project. I am excited about it because it has a significantly different sound. We already have the first single in place, it's getting mixed, and we're looking to make a video for it very soon, too.
This morning I am rather grumpy because I dropped my iPhone into a cup of tea as I randomly woke up in the wee hours of the morning and was checking the time. Fingers crossed it will dry out and be as good as new - because it IS new - my old one was washed in the washing machine prior to my departure for Russia. I am never this clumsy, I have no idea what is happening.
I'll just choose to believe that something amazing is around the corner and this is a way to get any kinks out of the way. Yeah, yeah, I know. But I have to believe something other than that I have to get a new iPhone.
Last night's show in Moscow was very special. First and foremost, this was a great show for both myself and the guys. Secondly, this is my home turf - I grew up here. To perform in front of a few thousand people and win them over is something every artist dreams about, I suppose.
This was a proper way to finish off this year, so to speak. Now it's back to recording and focusing on music and planning for next year. My birthday is coming up, too.
The show in St. Petersburg was wonderful and terrifying. Wonderful because, well, any opportunity to perform my songs in front of many, many people is wonderful. Terrifying because I was having tech issues 2 minutes prior to my set, and then others IN my set. Fortunately they stopped. But having your microphone misfire in front of 8,000+ people is not something I care to do a lot unless I want to have an early stroke.
I am in Moscow now and it snowed a bit yesterday. Nothing to write home about, though. I was also fighting off an ear infection for a few days, and only now it seems like it's mostly gone away. I kept myself in denial about it because the last time I had one was when I was 11 or something - but after a couple of days of my ear being distinctly unhappy, I had to admit to myself there may be a problem.
All in all I pulled it off, but I am hoping to crush it day after tomorrow.
Also, I wasn't able to do my live broadcast with Bambuser because this train we took back to Moscow did NOT have wi fi. It was quaint and quite old and restored etc - but no whiff of wi fi anywhere. Oh well. I am thinking I should do it this Thursday before or after the next concert.
Yes, Thursday there's another big show, and it's a big deal for me - home turf and all - also quite a good way to finish up this year of Hero EP, touring Russia for the first time, releasing my own self produced project for the first time, all those things. To me, the year started last November when I was here and met with Bi-2 to collaborate, and then went to their huge show (at same venue we're performing at this week) and we decided to tour together.
A lot learned, a lot gained, for sure. That said, I am sitting here and as I am trying to be kind to myself in a 'good girl, you did a lot!' sort of way, I find myself failing and all I can think of is what I COULD and SHOULD have done, instead, how much MORE I could have accomplished. Oh well. I am also thinking about everything I should and must be doing NOW and this December. No warm and fuzzy holiday/birthday feelings for me this week, only thoughts of what I want to get done, recording and organization-wise.
Maybe it's something in the stars. Oftentimes, the feeling of my coming up short of my own potential immobilizes me. But now, I just become aware of what I need to do, and - although sometimes rather impatiently - I go and get it done.
Yes, it was a crazy, but rather good year. What did I learn?
Practice makes perfect.
Preparation, preparation, preparation.
Faith, discipline and courtesy.
Those are everything.
Oh and also laugh more. Appreciate others, let them know and give more of yourself. Nothing - and no one - is a given.
What's ahead? Music, music and more music. This coming year I want to travel, perform and live life to the fullest, without fear, without being stuck in my head. I feel like I am hatching, and maybe 3/4 out of my shell now. What's next? Maybe I'll just do my best and then see.
And for now, here's this: acoustic and a bit operatic;)
As to other things: almost finished with the Japanese EP, the Chinese recording - and the Hero full album has been pushed to spring, but as you can see, we are putting up more music and recordings in the meantime.
Dreamer has a Christmas version, too! Stay tuned...
I am sitting half dressed in the hotel room and about to get ready and go to perform.
I am in St. Petersburg. It is such a beautiful city, I wish I had a bit more time to go out and walk around. This city is very moody, though, even more than Moscow - right now the skies are gray, overcast and look like lead, hanging over the streets, really close to the ground. Anyway, usually I would still go out, armed with an espresso and brave the weather.
But I am fighting off a bit of a virus of some kind I picked up somewhere, so my energy has been somewhat limited. We came here via a night train. It left Moscow at midnight. It really is as romantic as it sounds, except there was no one special here to share my train compartment, so I drank my tea, listened to music in my headphones and stared out into the darkness, which pressed against the train windows.
After the show - I am opening for Bi-2 and then performing with them, as well - we catch another night train. I will try to do another Bambuser broadcast then. The train we took to come here had wi fi, so I am hoping this one will, too.
I also just posted a cover of a Russian song I love - it's called 'The Prayer" by Bi-2.
Hearts up on the roof
are breathing slowly before they leap
I can hear all your thoughts
All we care about has gone topsy-curvy
How can one say this, without breaking it, tearing it apart
We are a like a river, here for ages
like the words of a prayer
Everything, except love
our whole life - so far away
I am not alone
but I am no one without you
Ashes are light and weightless
you didn't notice the swift passage of time
the spell runs out and pearls become glass
How empty it is, on the inside
without mirages, without magic
We are here only for a moment
let it sound like the words of a prayer
Alright, so here is the window for Bambuser. I am planning on giving this a go and doing a live broadcast at 3PM PST, while I am on the night train, which is carrying me away into wide open spaces...
Well, lots and lots. First and foremost, I am working on an acoustic EP, called Fairytales and Satellites, to be out by summer's end. It's all just piano and voice... ok voices, and some beautiful strings here and there. The titles are:
Fairy Tale for Girls
I am very excited about it because unlike HERO, this EP very will be very pure and acoustic. I get so ambitious when I record or arrange these days. Fairy Tales and Satellites is a good counterpart to Hero because it is so stripped down and breathes differently. As a matter of fact, the original takes that are being used were not even recorded to click - they are performances, and it also gives the songs/tracks a different kind of vibe, which is not as polished and very organic.
Plus, the full Hero album promises to be pretty ambitious and full sounding, just like the Hero EP, so Fairy Tales and Satellites provides a welcome harbor for those of my fans who miss Beatrix Runs. Also - Bella Anima is a hybrid pop/opera kind of song, just like Odi et Amo, so since the Hero EP didn't have any opera on it, this should soothe the pain;)
This past weekend I was a guest of B2 at Russia's largest open air rock music festival, aka NASHESTVIE. It means Invasion, more or less. I guested on one of my favorite songs of theirs - Молитва, or Prayer. Actually, I am going to post a cover of it shortly.
By the way, do you see a pattern here: I release an EP called HERO, which then gets used for an epic viral Superman video, and following that I perform at a festival called Invasion? Coincidence? I think not!;)
Performing in front of 120,000 people is quite a high, let me tell you. There was a symphony orchestra and fireworks. I wore a new headpiece, designed by my lovely i102fly:
Ignore the sweater with dots. This photo was taken in the green room/tent and I was trying to keep warm. By evening's end it was FREEZING cold. I thought I would die. But I still wore the dress. Ah, the pressures of performing life;)
Unfortunately that morning I woke up absolutely sick - apparently I had had some sort of food poisoning. Warning: do not eat little cakes in Moscow's cafes you are not familiar with - which I had.
Shura B2, one of the band's two leads, suggested I take some super Soviet remedy which had been developed in the USSR in the 70's for cosmonauts, in case they got poisoned by something in space. Ok. Well, it worked - it tasted like chalk, but by the afternoon I was alive and well and keeping food down, as opposed to lying down flat with my eyes closed.
Note to self: driving for three hours on Russian country roads while sick from food poisoning is not something that can or should be done on regular basis.
All in all, I'd love to do it again. And again. And again. I mean, the performance part, not the food poisoning part. It was unreal, it was beautiful - it was a high of all highs.
Speaking of performing in front of large crowds. Here is a video we just posted of my performance of Dreamer with symphony orchestra in Minsk, Belarus (Minsk Arena), when I was touring in support of B-2. Maybe not 120,000 people, but definitely around 12,000. I was terrified out of my mind, but had such fun. My personal favorite part of the video is when the camera pans across the keyboard player who is having a blast. What else could I ask for, really?:)
Other updates and things coming up or in the works:
- A cute and much delayed fan-sourced HERO video, where I am talking about the song. It features footage from fans and kids.
- Japanese language EP (two songs, Dreamer and Hero)
- Odi et Amo in Chinese
- Two new covers
- Full Hero album this winter
- Full Russian language album this spring
However, there are other big things in progress I am not quite at liberty to talk about just yet... so stay tuned, my darlings;)
The PegBoard Nerds version of HERO was used by their label Monstercat for a remix contest. So now, if you go to YouTube, and type in Elizaveta, what you get is literally hundreds of Hero remixes of all kinds.
A final note to my fans who read this: I know it takes me time to deliver things I promise to you, like the Hero video. However, since I am an indie artist at the moment, a lot rests on my shoulders and sometimes things just take - a lot - longer. This will change soon enough as I am putting together a new team and a framework for myself which will make everything easier. But I am not quite there yet. So I am the CEO, the builder, the artist, and the everything.
Well, except for you, who read this, listen to my music and come to my concerts. Without you, there would not be much at all, so thank you for your patience:)
There has been a heat wave here in Los Angeles in the past few days. My mom in Moscow tells me there is one there, too. Climate change is a reality. I can't believe there are still many influential politicians who are denying this particular factoid - well, specifically, that it may have to do something with humans. We certainly hate to take responsibility.
But this morning I did wake up early, although I stayed up late working on music, and made it to the beach. I ran, I played in the waves a bit, I tried to meditate. There were lots of dolphins going by, past the surfers who kept trying to catch the sporadic waves.
I found myself wishing I had taken my phone to take a couple of photos and it got me thinking about the nature of reality as we are living it now. It's almost as if when we don't share it, it hasn't happened. If you experience a beautiful, spectacular moment, one of the first thoughts is: Oh, wait, I must film this. Certainly, I live in and out of the social media because of what I do for a living. I don't dislike the process, unlike some of my counterparts, which is understandable. In fact, a part of me rather enjoys it at times.
However it brings me to thinking about reality and how fragmented it has become for so many of us. Perhaps I am completely in the wrong here and there's a Luddite hidden in me, but how much of our attention in the moment goes to our device, in order to share that moment and get lots of likes, rather than to the moment itself?
I watched the dolphins go by, and one of them jumped a couple of times into the air, for no apparent reason, other than enjoying that moment, in the surf, with the sun rising, fish swimming and the surfers bobbing up and down on their boards, looking like seals. If dolphins had opposable thumbs, would they have invented mobile phones?
I was glad in that moment I didn't have my phone with me and made a resolution to never bring it to these morning outings. I spend enough time in front of screens, as it is.
And then I wondered about the nature of reality again, and what we make it, and how what we share is often not the truth, but something we wish it was.
I have been to so many parties and events where the whole point was not even the event itself, but the fact that it happened, period. People took photos of themselves, making it look like they were having the time of their lives, when it was not necessarily the case. Or, a half empty room can look pretty full and exciting, when someone takes a photo, which is strategically aimed, placed or edited.
We take carefully aimed and lit photos of ourselves, too, whenever we can. Or photos of the incredible food we are having, places we are, or people we are with. It's all in the editing. But it begs the question: do we share so much because there's just simply so much to share? Life overflows with bounty and excitement? Or is it because if we don't share it's almost as if it didn't happen, and we need to convince ourselves how grand and meaningful our lives really are?
You tell me.
It brings me to something someone very wise told me the other day: "When you create, do it to share, not to prove something". It took me a second to truly get where she was going with this because on the surface it's not that complicated, and begs to be discarded as a cliche. And yet, it's so profound, and it's related directly to what I was writing about above.
Speaking of sharing - I am working on a cover of a Def Leppard song. It's quite, quite different from the original. I am having a lot of fun with it, but there is much more urgent and important work to do, so it's a bit of musical procrastination. And yet, I need to allow myself to do this because sometimes I just need to play around in the musical sandbox without any particular aim or purpose, other than having fun with it. I tend to forget to do that and it's a necessity.